Love Comes In The Weirdest Ways
by GoldenWaffle55
Summary: Zim is a normal boy that lives a simple life, with his simple family, and simple friends. What happens when the new boy from school comes along to complicate it all? ZaGir human AU and I may add other pairings later.
1. Chapter 1

Zim Invader was a happy, proud, little 13 year old boy who lived a simple, normal life. He had a small family consisting of him, his little brother Skooge, and his two older twin brothers, whom he had nicknamed Red and Purple (since those were the twins favorite colors), that took care of him and his little brother. Their parents had died when Zim and Skooge were very little and ever since, they've been in the care of their older siblings. Zim never really knew who his parents were, he could only remember little bits a pieces of them and they were very blurred. The two older and much taller boys picked on them a lot for being so small and weak. Zim got the bulk of the bullying since he was the smallest one out of the four. He hated how his little brother was taller than him by a few inches, Zim being 4'10" and Skooge 5'0". Even though he was teased and picked on my his older brothers, he knew they loved him and was very grateful for the shelter and security they provided him.

He had a small variety of friends; his best friend being an enormous headed boy named Dib Membrane who is obsessed with the paranormal. He and Dib had bonded over Zim's peculiar last name in kindergarten. They pretended that Zim was an alien invader from a made up planet called Irk that was sent here to destroy Earth while Dib tried to capture and stop him. They both really enjoyed their game and have been best friends ever since.

He was a very awkward boy. He had a hard time making friends because of his prideful and egotistic personality. The friends he did have, however, he was extremely loyal to them. Anyone who dared to mess with his friends or family would suffer a rein of terror that Zim unleashed on them. He always tried his best to be nice to people, but he had a hard time expressing his feelings so he sometimes came off as cold. He also had a bad case of OCD that everyone, including himself, thought was unhealthy. He has never been a lazy person and always completes his work to the best of his abilities. If someone took the time and effort to really get to know Zim, they'd get the most amazing friend in the world, according to Zim anyway.

Zim really had everything he could ask for; a nice, yet strangely structured house, a loving family, and a great best friend. Everything in the boy's life was calm and orderly, just the way he liked it. He had no idea that all of that was about to change one cool autumn morning at skool.

"You'll never get me, filthy human worm-baby!" Zim shrieked from across the class room at his friend as he ducked behind his desk. They were currently in the middle of a game involving Zim trying to take over the world with rubber chickens and super glue.

"Get back here, alien scum!" Dib shouted back as he chased Zim with fake hand-cuffs.

"Zim! Dib! Sit down and be quiet!" their creepy teacher, Ms. Bitters, yelled at them. The two boys mumbled a 'yes, ma'am' and sat at their desks that were across the room from each other. They originally had seats next to each other, but the teacher separated them for goofing off too much in class. "Today we have another miserable pubescent boy to add to this crowded, sad excuse for a school. His future, just like yours, will be dark and horrible."

Zim's head perked up at the announcement and gave his full attention to the front of the class. He wasn't the most liked kid in school and picked on a lot for being so small and 'weird'. Zim was pretty sure everyone at the school except for himself, Dib, Gaz (Dib's sinister little sister), and Tak, his other long time friend, was stupid. He wanted to make sure that he got to this new kid first so he wasn't corrupted by the rest of these terrible kids.

The door shot open and a blur of green and black bounced into the room. Ms. Bitters had to yell at the blur to stand still and when Zim could actually see the being, he was a little surprised. A boy, undoubtedly shorter than Zim, was standing in front of the class room holding a rubber piggy and humming quietly. He had short, messy, silver hair and cyan eyes so brightly colored, they almost looked like they were glowing. His skin was so pale it looked almost white. He was wearing a lime green sweater with black sleeves, black pants, and blue shoes that were a slightly darker shade than his eyes. He looked and acted like a second grader so Zim could only imagine that he must be really immature or an extremely smart second grader that skipped a few grades. Zim and Dib glanced at each other, sharing the same thoughts.

"Class, this is Gir. Say hello to the class, Gir, take your seat, and then I don't want to hear another word out of your horrible mouth for the rest of the day." Ms. Bitters hissed out and then went back to her desk to get out her lesson plans of doom. The new boy, apparently named Gir, raised his hand in the air as high as it could possibly go and waved it back and forth rapidly.

"Hiiiii!" he yelled in a high pitched voice. After everyone grumbled out their greetings, Gir skipped off to an empty seat that happened to be directly behind Zim's desk. He turned around and watched as the silver haired boy sat down and smiled wide at him. Zim gave him his signature 'one eye half open, one eye wide' look and then turned back around to listen to the teacher talk about how the Earth was doomed.

* * *

Zim made his way through the sea of children in the cafeteria and sat down at the table he and his friends always shared. Dib and Tak were already there eating and talking about the new model space-ship they were building. Luckily Gaz wasn't there to make their lunch a living hell. Zim took his seat across from them and opened his pink and grey backpack to pull out his lunch. The food at skool was terrible and ever since the first day of skool when he had to get his stomach pumped, he started packing his own lunches. He pulled the paper lid off his Fun-Dip and began eating.

Tak finished her conversation with Dib and turned to greet Zim, but stopped when she noticed what he was eating. "That's candy." she stated.

Zim turned the little container to read the label and dipped his white stick into the powery candy. "Why yes, Tak. Indeed it is candy. You are very observant."

"I think she was trying to ask you why are you eating candy for lunch?" Dib interjected.

"Oh. Well isn't it obvious? I love candy! Plus, Purple forgot to go shopping again so this was all I could find."

"Which one is Purple again?" Dib asked stupidly. Both Tak and Zim looked at him and raised their eye brows.

"The one that wears purple all the time?" Zim answered like Dib was stupid.

"Right..." Dib looked away embarrassed and thought of something to change the conversation to. "So that new kid is kinda weird, huh?"

"What new kid?" Tak questioned wanting to hear the gossip.

"There's this new kid in our class and he's really weird." Zim explained. "He sits behind me and he's actually shorter than me! His name is Gir."

"Well that's something." Tak pondered. "Someone shorter and weirder than Zim? Impossible, I won't believe it until I see it."

Zim glared at her. "It's true! So very true! You'll see and you'll apologize for insulting the amazingness that is Zim!"

Tak rolled her eyes and flicked her blue hair out of her face.

"He looks kinda weird too." Dib continued the conversation. "He has silver hair and really bright blue eyes. His eyes are so huge, they almost take up his entire face, it's insane! You'd think the silver hair would make him look badass but it doesn't. It just makes him look crazy. I wonder if he's some sort of elf."

"Silver hair and blue eyes... You mean like that?" Tak pointed behind Zim and he screamed when he turned and saw the new kid standing behind him. Zim fell out of the bench and onto the floor.

"Why were you creeping up behind me!?" Zim shouted.

"I like you." was all the new boy said. Zim gave him his signature look again and stood up, brushing himself off. He looked down at Gir and said nothing. This boy was smaller than Zim had thought when he was sitting down. Now that he was actually standing next to the boy, he could better see the height difference between them. Gir only came up to his chest and Zim had to turn his head downward to see him. Gir held out his little rubber piggy and squeaked it in Zim's face.

"I stand corrected." Tak laughed. "He really is shorter and weirder than you."

"Zim is always right." he said shaking his fist in the air. He looked back down and Gir and decided that now was a good enough time as any to introduce themselves. "Eh, so Gir, I am the amazing Zim, and this is Dib with the big head, and the ugly girl is Tak."

Tak threw her half eaten hotdog at Zim's face and his face started to swell, since he was somehow allergic to whatever they put in hotdogs. Gir waved to the two at the table and pointed to Dib. "I'm gonna call you Mary!"

"But I'm a boy." Dib said feeling a little insulted.

"Why is your head so big!? WHY!?" Gir shouted extremely loud. Tak couldn't help herself from laughing and Zim was snickering a little. Dib's cheeks flared up and he stood and stomped away yelling that his head wasn't big. When Zim controlled his laughter he looked to Gir and put his hands on his hips.

"I like you, too, Gir! Perhaps we can make this friendship work! Be honored!"

Suddenly Gaz came into the lunch room and sat next to Tak. Zim has always been terrified of her ever since she squirted soda into his eyes and blinded him for about a week. Zim grabbed his lunch and backpack and ran out of the cafeteria, leaving Gaz and Tak to talk behind with Gir who was fascinated with Gaz and her purple hair.

* * *

**Heehee, I like writing a million fanfictions at once. This idea just came to me a couple days ago while I was eating a breakfast burrito. Weird, I know, but I had a MIGHTY NEED to write it. **

**Not gonna lie, I have no idea where I'm gonna go with this. I don't know if I should make it all angsty and have Zim's brothers kick him out of the house and abandon him like the tallest did when they exiled Irken Zim to Earth, or if I should make this hella funny and random with lots of ZaGir fluff. If the readers could review and vote for which one I should chose, that would make me happy. **

**I'm not updating this til I get at least one review. I can't make up my mind and I need help. **

***Flies away into the sunset* **


	2. Slenderman is always watching

Zim was glad when the final bell rang for the end of school. Ever since Zim had moved to this town he never really learned anything in school. It was always 'the Earth is doomed' this and 'everyone's lives are miserable' that. The name of the school building wasn't even spelled correctly. Now school was basically just a place for him to get yelled at and picked on by stupid people for eight hours, so Zim was more than enthusiastic about leaving 'skool'. He gathered all of his things and headed outside to meet Dib. They always walked home together after school since their houses were close- Dib's being the closest.

"How's everything at your house?" Zim asked, trying to start up a conversation as they walked. "Is your mom still trying to make you learn piano?"

"Ugh, yeah. I keep telling her that piano just isn't my thing, but she doesn't listen!" Dib shouted.

"Haha, you have to learn piano." Zim taunted.

"It's not funny! I don't have time to learn an instrument. I have to do more research on chupacabras and slenderman!"

"Slenderman doesn't exist."

"He might! You never know! He's always watching!" Dib turned around sharply and pointed behind them at nothing. Zim rolled his lavender eyes and kicked his friend's leg. Dib turned around again and saw that they had arrived at his house.

"Oh, hey, we're here. That was fast. I guess I'll see you later then, Zim!" The two waved goodbye to each other and Zim started walking toward his own house.

Pfft, slenderman. He knew Dib was into the paranormal but Slenderman was just dumb. It was just some stupid propaganda on the internet to entertain people. It was a guy in a black suit, with no face, that steals little kids. Did Dib really believe in something as absurd as that? Anyone who believed in Senderman was a complete idiot. Zim chuckled to himself about this.

A little ways from Dib's house he had a feeling he was being followed. He looked around but didn't see anyone. He shrugged it off as him being paranoid, but the feeling stayed. He looked around a bit more nervously, but there was still no one.

"I'm on to you, Dib! Trying to sneak up on Zim, are you? Well it didn't work, so stop hiding and come out to face your wrath!" he yelled just in case Dib was trying to sneak attack him. When he saw no scythe haired boy jump out of the bushes, he started getting a little worried and walked just a little faster. He started whistling as if nothing were happening. He heard a noise behind him and whipped around.

"S-slenderman?" he asked to the nothingness behind him. He felt ridiculous for asking that, but he was a little worried. What if he had accidentally angered Slenderman for thinking he was stupid and now he was after Zim and was gonna kidnap him!? He didn't mean to bring on the wrath of Slendy! He turned around again to start running as fast as he could to the security of his home, but ran right into something hard and fell on the ground. The impact of the fall left him feeling dizzy and dazed and he had to strain his eyes to focus on the person hovering above him. He looked up, expecting to see a tall man in a black suit, but he was wrong when his eyes met a pair of large, cyan eyes.

"Hi." Gir said smiling down at the startled boy. Zim's face went from petrified pale to livid red in a matter of seconds. He bolted to his feet and glared down at the cheery boy for making the almighty Zim scared.

"This is the second time you've snuck up on me today! Stop doing that! I thought you were cool at first, but now you're annoying, leave me alone!" and with that, Zim stomped past Gir without waiting for a response. He thought Gir had left him alone, since most people did after Zim lashed out at them, but a few seconds later Gir was by his side, rambling about nonsense. Zim yelled at Gir in his loudest, most enraged voice he had, but it didn't even faze him. He just continued being irritating.

"Go home, Gir!"

"My house is filled with muffins!"

"Home, Gir. Now!"

"You have a loud voice. Sometimes when I yell too loud I throw up!"

"I SAID GO HOME!"

"One time a squirrel gave me a cactus for my birthday!"

"GO. HOME. NOW."

"When's your birthday!?"

Zim made a loud noise that sounded like the equivalent of keyboard smashing random letters. He was about to push this annoying little runt in front of a car driving by when he noticed he was finally at his house. He took a deep breath to calm himself down and smiled at Gir.

"Well, Gir, I'd love to tell when my birthday is but, um, I hate you and here's my house so, bye!" Zim ran to his front door as fast as possible and flung it open, darted inside, and slammed and locked the door behind him.

He leaned against the door panting for a moment. When he gained his composer he looked out the window to make sure that kid wasn't still out there. The boy was still there, staring at the house before sticking out his tongue and skipping away. Zim gulped, afraid that Gir had memorized his address and was planning to come back later to harass him.

He really had liked Gir at first, he seemed like a fun person. But after being embarrassed like that in front of him, Zim was afraid of what Gir would think of him. Judgement was one of Zim's greatest fears and he had really bad anxiety about it. Everyone else at school already thought Zim was some sort of freak and already Zim had been embarrassed in front of the new kid twice in one day. Gir probably thought Zim was some sort of wimp or something. That's why he was acting so mean to Gir, because that was the only way he knew how to handle it. Of course, Zim would never admit this to anyone, not even himself. He viewed himself as strong and immovable like a rock, he couldn't possibly be afraid of some kid judging him. That was just ludicrous.

"Hey, shorty, why did you lock the door? Are you and that little friend of yours playing another alien game?"

Zim turned his attention to his big brother, Red, who was sitting on the couch in their small living room, playing video games. He was thankful that it was only Red. For some reason Purple seemed to like tormenting Zim more. Red was a little more nicer and tolerant toward him. Zim stood up straight and walked over to the big red couch to sit on it. "No. And, eh, if a really short kid with silver hair knocks on the door asking for me, tell him I got my head stuck in a shoe or something equally stupid."

Red raised an eyebrow, but continued to play his game. "'You got your head stuck in a shoe'? What kind of excuse is that?"

"A very dumb excuse for a very dumb person. There's a new kid at school and he's so annoying! He followed me home and won't leave me alone!"

"Ah." Red nodded his head in understanding. "That's what you get for being so small."

"Zim is not sure what being small has to do with a crazy, filth child following him home, but alright." Zim scanned the area with his eyes for moment, looking for any signs of his other brothers. Red noticed this and answered Zim's unspoken question.

"Skoodge is downstairs in his room being ugly and Purple went to the store. He _finally_ decided to take on some responsibility for once instead of making me do everything. Speaking of which, I'm busy right now so why don't you go do something somewhere else?"

"Very well. Zim will go somewhere else and do THINGS." Zim stood from the couch and marched off to the stairs that led to the rest of the house underground. The only rooms on the main floor were the living room and kitchen. Everyone's room, the bathroom, and the storage room, were downstairs. There were a lot of stairs and often times if Zim was tired or just plain bored, he would roll down them instead of walking. Right now, though, he just ran down them to get to his room so he could write in his secret notebook about today's crazy events.

And, no, Zim did not write in a diary! It was simply a notebook where he documents the events of his daily life and his thoughts and feelings about them. It was a perfectly normal activity for a human male to do and there was nothing feminine about it!

Zim walked into his room and flipped on the light-switch. Since his room was underground and had no windows, there was no way for natural light to come in, so he had a lot of lights. He never liked it too bright, nor too dark, so he had very dim lights that gave off a pinkish glow. Yes, it was strange for a boy to have pink lights in his room, but it was his favorite color so it didn't matter. And it's not like many people came into his room anyway. Only his family came into his room. Not even Dib, his best friend, had been in his room before. He was a very secretive person and he didn't want anyone looking through his stuff.

Zim took off his very special backpack, that was so special to him he felt like he would literally die in 10 minutes without it, and set it gently on it's special shelf. He then went to his bed and crawled under it. He immediately found the little piece of string sticking out of the floor and pulled it. A secret compartment opened up that only he knew about and he rummaged around through his hidden stash of snacks and money until he found his black and purple notebook. He pulled it out, along with a green pen, and quietly shut the compartment again. He slid out from under his bed and laid on top of it. He took a minute to adjust the pillows just the way he liked them and then debated whether he should write in his native language or English. Deciding on English, since he wasn't writing about anything _too_ secretive, he began writing.

_Sept. 29, 2012_

_Today has been pretty annoying. This morning I couldn't find anything to eat because stupid Purple forgot to go to the store. Sometimes I wonder if he forgets on purpose so he can make my life harder. Luckily I still have a bunch of food in the compartment under my bed so I just grabbed something out of there. Although, Tak tried to tell me I couldn't eat candy at school. Who made her the queen of what I can and can't eat!? Besides, it's not like any of the teachers care if I eat candy so why should she? She's probably just jealous because I had candy and all she had were the disgusting hotdogs that she eats EVERY DAY. I know her dad is the owner of the weenie company but does she really need to eat those horrid meat sticks every day? _

_Also, there's a new kid at school. His name is Gir and he's so annoying. I think he is what annoys me the most on this day. He's really hyper and couldn't seem to stand or sit still at all. When he first came into the class room, I could barely see him because of how fast he was moving. I thought he would be a cool friend to have around at first, but then he kept making me fall down. He would sneak up behind me and yell right in my ear! His voice sounds like broken glass being scratched against a chalk board. I can't stand it when he talks. And he talks really loud! I'm sure everyone in the class rooms around us heard him when he was introduced to the class. And the worst part is he sits right behind my desk so I'll have to deal with him tomorrow too. Hopefully he won't follow me home tomorrow. _

_Oh yeah! I almost forgot to mention that he followed me home today! After Dib left me to go to his house, Gir was following me, and made me scared. Yes, that's right, **scared. **He actually made the almighty me, scared! He was sneaking around me and I couldn't see him until he pushed me down. _

_Okay, he didn't push me down because no one is strong enough to push me down. I accidentally ran into him. Not that I'm clumsy or anything, I just didn't happen to see him standing in front of me. How could I when he's so short? He is actually shorter than me but he's the same age as me. How pathetic is that? _

_And what kind of name is Gir, anyway? It sounds like a name you would give to a dog, since dogs growl. But someone stupidly named their child Gir. I pity Gir in a way for having such a dumb name. _

Zim stopped his writing when he heard a knock on his door. He quickly hid his notebook under a pillow and picked up his DS off the nightstand to make it seem like he had been playing video games the whole time.

"Hey, Zim, are you in here?" Skoodge poked in his head into Zim's room and smiled. "Oh, good, you are in here."

"What do you want, Skoodge, I'm in the middle of playing my _Nin-ten-do Dee_ _Ess_." Zim said the word very drawn out and forced since he still wasn't exactly used to saying a few English words properly.

Skoodge raised an eyebrow. "You're playing your DS upside down?"

Zim looked down at the handheld game system and noticed that it was, in fact, upside down. "Yes. Do not question Zim's methods."

"Alright then." Skoodge said a little confused. "Well, dinner is ready. You should come up an eat."

"Food!" Zim set his DS down and pushed past Skoodge to run upstairs. Fun-Dip wasn't exactly a very filling meal, so he was starving. Now he could finally have some real food.

* * *

Zim sat awkwardly at the table in between Purple and Skoodge. Usually the family of four would just grab their food and go their separate ways, but tonight Skoodge had somehow managed to gather everyone at the kitchen table to eat together. Zim didn't like that he was in sitting right next to Purple. The taller boy would most likely pick on him throughout the whole meal and Zim would barely be able to eat anything.

"I still don't know why we're all sitting here when Dre and I could be watching that new horror movie that just came out. And why the heck did you make me sit next to _him_?" Purple slapped Zim in the back of the head and scowled at him. Zim mostly ignored it since he was busy wolfing down a slice of pizza, but he did notice that Purple used Red's actual name. Normally the family used the nicknames that the twins had been given by Zim since they all thought the names were very suiting.

_Purple must be in a bad mood_ thought Zim.

"Calm down, I don't like it any more than you do, but it's not going to kill you to eat at the table." Red shot at Purple. "Besides we can watch it after the two shorties go to bed. Then we won't have to put up with them during the movie."

Purple grumbled a bit under his breath, but said nothing else. The whole family was silent while they ate, which is the exact opposite of what Skoodge had gathered them to the table for.

"So, Zim, did anything interesting happen at school today?" he said trying to start a conversation.

Having his mouth too full, Zim shook his head and did his best not to get pizza sauce all over his face.

"I thought you said some new kid followed you home?" Red asked.

"Yeah." Zim wiped his face with his napkin and set his pizza down. Now that Skoodge had started talking to him, he probably wouldn't have any more time to eat. "Little boys following you home isn't interesting, though. It's just plain creepy."

"What's this boy like?" Skoodge asked, glad he was getting somewhere in the whole family bonding thing.

"Irritating, ugly, stupid, small, weird, hyper, and loud. And that's all there is to explain about him. And now if you'll excuse Zim, I'll be leaving now." Zim didn't want to go through this all again. He already explain this to Red and he wrote it in his notebook, he didn't want to have to have to talk to Skoodge about it too. Zim is older than Skoodge, he shouldn't have to take orders from his little brother. He should be able to do whatever he wants, unless of course his older brothers had any objections. Not hearing either of the twins protest to Zim's leaving, he picked up his plate, put it in the sink, and headed back downstairs.

Zim went back into his room and took the notebook out from under his pillow. He read over what he had wrote and debated if he should write more or leave it at that. No, he didn't want to write about anything anymore. He put it back in it's secret spot and went to his closet to look for some clothes. Grabbing a plain black T-shirt and a pair of green sweat pants with black skulls, he began to change into them. He glanced at his digital clock and noticed it was only seven o'clock. It wasn't quite time for him to go to sleep.

Not knowing what else to do, he grabbed his DS off the nightstand again and turned it on. He glared at that bright light it gave off, but decided it was better than doing nothing. Zim played the pixelated Japanese game that the kids at school called POKE-A-MAN. What kind of game exactly was this? Is it a game about poking men? That didn't seem fun at all. Zim was wrong as he found himself catching strange creatures and making them battle other creatures late into the night.

* * *

**I finally decided on what I should do with this story! I realized that Zim is too naive for it to be angst, but there will be some sad parts in it, for those of you who were hoping for angst. It will mostly be random and fluffy though. **

**Also, for some questions that may be asked, Dib's mother is present in this fic. I don't know if that was mentioned in the last chapter, but it is in this one. And since Red and Purple are only nicknames, I had to come up with actual names for them. I just rearranged the letters in Red's name, making his name Dre, but I have no idea what to do for purple. I'll try to come up with a name though. **

**Thank you for the nice comments, as well! They gave me the motivation to write this next chapter. I may not update any of my stories as often any more since school is keeping my hands full and because Halloween is coming I'm making plans for that. I'll try my best to update whenever possible though! **

**Please review and stuff, you know the drill. **


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